Table rules

  • We talk about the real stuff going on in our lives, because “faking fine” gets us nowhere.
  • We aren’t here to fix each other, so no sermons or unwanted advice. We are here to listen to and encourage each other. 
  • We try to keep it short because we want everyone to be free to talk.
  • We trust that it’s God’s role to change people, not ours. 


  1. In what ways have you let the culture, opinions, or performance define you as a man and throw you into the comparison trap?

  2. Why is it so important to see yourself the way God sees you? How has that helped you reclaim your true identity?

Proverbs 29:25 (NLT)

Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.


• Allowing the CULTURE to define us
• Allowing OPINION POLLS to define us
• Allowing PERFORMANCE to define us



I'll live through you
I'll make you what I never was
If you're the best, then maybe so am I
Compared to him compared to her
I'm doing this for your own good
You'll make up for what I blew
What's the problem...why are you crying

Be a good girl
Push a little farther now
That wasn't fast enough
To make us happy
We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect


Ecclesiastes 4:4 (NLT)

Then I observed that most people are motivated to success by their envy of their neighbors. But this, too, is meaningless, like chasing the wind.


Ecclesiastes 2:22-23 (NLT)

So what do people get in this life for all their hard work and anxiety? Their days of labor are filled with pain and grief; even at night their minds cannot rest. It is all meaningless.


• Doing whatever it takes to WIN


Patrick Morley

“Failure is to succeed at something that really doesn’t matter.”



No occasion justifies hatred; no injustice warrants bitterness. I choose love. Today I will love God and what God does.



I will invite my God to be the God of circumstance. I will refuse the temptation to be cynical…the tool of the lazy thinker. I will refuse to see people as anything less than human beings, created by God.  I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God.



I will live forgiven. I will forgive so that I may live.



I will overlook the inconveniences of the world. Rather than complain that the wait is too long, I will thank God for a moment to pray. Instead of clenching my fists at new assignments, I will face them with joy and courage.



I will be kind to the poor, for they are alone. Kind to the rich, for they are afraid. And kind to the unkind, for such is how God has treated me.



I will go without a dollar before I take a dishonest one. I will be overlooked before I will boast. I will confess before I will accuse. I choose goodness.



Today I will keep my promises. My debtors will not regret their trust. My associates will not question my word. My wife will not question my love. And my children will never fear that their father will not come home.



Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it only be of myself.



I am a spiritual being…after this body is dead, my spirit will soar. I refuse to let what will rot, rule the eternal. I choose self-control. I will be drunk only by joy. I will be impassioned only by my faith. I will be influenced only by God. I will be taught only by Christ. I choose self-control


Max Lucado

Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. to these I commit my day. If I succeed, I will give thanks. If I fail, I will seek His grace. And then, when this day is done, I will place my head on my pillow and rest.