We read this statement together before every group discussion! It helps transition the group to discussion time, it reaffirms our highest values, and sets a tone of trust, consistency, and safety for everyone in the group.
We are a group of imperfect people pursuing a perfect God. We exist to help each other find and follow Christ. These are some things we want to be true of our group:
- We create a safe and honest environment, staying transparent and authentic.
- We keep it inside the circle. Confidentiality is necessary for a healthy group.
- We look together to the Bible for help and guidance, and keep out our own politics, sales, or agendas.
- We do not try to fix each other, preach sermons, or give unsolicited advice. We instead encourage, listen to, and celebrate each other.
- We handle conflict between us quickly and honestly by going to the person, owning our part, and practicing forgiveness.
- We respect each others’ time by starting and ending when we say we will.
- We trust that it is God’s role to change people, not ours.
- We believe that in Jesus Christ, there is hope for everyone.
We live in a culture where we are expected to put our best foot forward, paint on a smile, pull ourselves up by our own bootstraps and post our wonderfully awesome life. During this series at Mission, we will discover together what it means to stop faking fine and get real with God and each other.
Mike started this series off by talking about Ending The Pretending. We learned that getting well is something we all need to do at some point in our lives. And, no matter what we have done, seen or experienced, Mike challenged us to believe that Jesus can and wants to make us well.
CONNECT
- If this is your first session together as a group, or you've got new additions, spend some time getting to know each other!
- How'd you find Mission?
- How long have you been around?
- What made you want to get into a group?
- What were some of the highlights of your summer?
DISCOVER
The book of John is one of four historical accounts of Jesus' life and ministry. In this story, Jesus sees a man who had been cast out of society for decades because he was unable to walk.
Read John 5:2-7 together.
Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for a feast of the Jews. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie--the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years.
When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, "Do you want to get well?"
“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.”
- Jesus asks the disabled man a seemingly crazy question..."do you want to get well?" Why does he start the conversation this way?
- What is "off" about the man's response to Jesus' question? What does his response tell us about his state of mind?
APPLY
- Have you ever experienced the spin cycle of living that Mike talked about?
(try harder... fail... guilt... shame... hide... promise... back to trying harder...)
- Mike said that Self-Deception + Self-Reliance = Self-Destruction. How have you seen this play out in your own life or in the lives of those close to you?
- The man in the story answers Jesus' question by blaming others for his current state. If Jesus asked you the same question ("do you want to get well") right now, how do you think you'd respond?
- The man's "mat" was what defined him his entire life, but Jesus told him to take it with him after he was healed. Why can "taking your mat" and sharing your story be hard at times? Why did Jesus think it was so important for the man to take his mat?
- Most of us are pretty accomplished hypo-FINE-riacs, and do a pretty good job of keeping our masks on. For you, what is appealing about the idea of walking in freedom? What would you need to do this week to take a step toward ending the pretending and walking in freedom?
EXPERIENCE (for the rest of the week)
- If we are going to end the pretending, we first need to get a handle on HOW we are pretending. Take some time alone this week to write down the masks you wear, or the ways that you act like a "hypo-FINE-riac". Use that list to pray for the courage to END the pretending and drop the mask!
- Mike mentioned the idea of looking through the four historical accounts of Jesus' life (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) and circling the questions that Jesus asks people... since they are probably good questions He wants to ask us! Go through, write them down, and start thinking about how you would respond!
NO MORE FAKING FINE
- Ending the Pretending
- Beyond Instamacy
- No Perfect People
- Mess into Message
NEW WORDS TO LEARN
- PARENT-noid (the overwhelming fear that I becoming exactly like my parents...)
- REQUEST-ion (when someone asks you a question that's actually a request...)
- Volun-TOLD (when you got TOLD by someone that they volunteered you for something)
- CRAP-petite (craving things that are actually worthless)
- Hypo-FINE-riac (people that know things aren't great but incessantly say they're "fine")
John 5:2-6 (NIV)
Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for a feast of the Jews. Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. Here a great number of disabled people used to lie--the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years.
When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, "Do you want to get well?"
Do you want to get well?
SPIN CYCLE LIVING
- try harder...
- fail...
- guilt...
- shame...
- hide...
- promise...
- ...back to trying harder...
SELF-DECEPTION
+ SELF-RELIANCE
= SELF-DESTRUCTION
If we don’t really want to get well, we will lack the power to change.
“We found that God COULD and WOULD if He were sought.”
John 5:7-9
“Sir,” the invalid replied, “I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Get up! Take up your mat and walk.” At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.
Ending the Pretending
- Believe Jesus can make you well
- Believe Jesus wants to make you well
- Stop Blaming
- Be known
- Walk in Freedom